Thankful.

Dear Mom,


This weekend, I was reminded life is a gift, and should not be taken for granted. 


So in leu of all the emotions that have gone on this weekend from various things, including stress about this summer and the fall, and wishing I could be home tomorrow to release a dove for you, I want to take time to count my blessings. Time for corniness. 


I am thankful for the life that has been given to me.
I am thankful for all the love that I have and all the love that others have for me.
I am thankful for the roof over my head; my hometown home, and my closet room here.
I am thankful for my family, and all they have done for me. 
I am thankful for my best friends, and how they have shown me that they are the ones to lean on.
I am thankful for BB. He's not my boyfriend. He's not my brother. But he's my best friend, and that means so much more than words can describe.
I am thankful for Lou. For giving me hope, for giving me wisdom, for showing me I'm not the only dumby on the planet. For being my rock, for being the Lou to my Poo. 
I am thankful to all my secondary mommies. They mothered me before you were gone, and now my relationships with them have skyrocketed. 
I am thankful for my education. I go to a school in such a cultural city, and I appreciate it so much. I learn so much more here than I ever did in high school. 
I am thankful for music. I don't know what I would do if I was 100% deaf and couldn't enjoy such a wonderful thing.
I am thankful for Emily Jo. She's a year younger than me, but ten years older at heart. I swear she is such an inspiration to me, it's insane. And I don't think she'll ever understand how beautiful inside and out she really is.
I am thankful for all the boys who have broken my heart, because they have taught me to learn to live independently, and I have learned so much about myself. 
I am thankful for my sorority. It's so nice to be a part of such an amazing group of women who support each other so much. I can now see what sisterhood really means.
I am thankful for all my annoying brothers. They are such doofs, but I love them more than anything. 
I am thankful for Taylor Swift's lyrics.
I am thankful for the San Benito Stage Company and the high school drama department. Being on stage is my number one home, and I can't stand that I haven't performed in over a year. Theatre and the families formed in it gave me support, self confidence, and honestly the most fun I will ever have in my life.
I am thankful for all the people in my life who go out of their way to check up on me, to acknowledge me from time to time, just being good friends. A little wall post or text can really make a bad day better. 


But most of all Mommy, I am thankful for you. The life you gave me, the world you brought me to. All the life lessons you didn't know you gave me. The smile we share. Your annoyingly contagious laugh. Your enormous heart and generosity. Your love for me. The love we share. I am so thankful I got to have you for the time I did, because you are the reason I am who I am today. Every good decision I make, it's because I know you are looking down proud of me. 


You're my best friend mom. I miss you so much, but I know that we won't be separated forever. So until the day comes when we get to reunite, I will stay down here, and keep writing to you, making sense of the nonsense of my teenage rambles. 








                Love your babydoll,
                Tessy Loo Loo